Out of the frying pan...

I seem to recall promising to post a scene some time ago. Now, the one I wanted to post finally got workshopped last Tuesday and I decided it sucked as a theatrical morsel; it needed to become a full-fledged ten-minute play to be any good. So I'm not going to post that here. But I will post another morsel that will hopefully spawn some giggles and end your Monday on a good note. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you "Out of the frying pan."

OLIVER (11) is sporting a fresh black eye. He stands at the kitchen sink, dutifully scrubbing dishes and passing them to CALEB (15), who clearly thinks he has better things to do than dry dishes.

(CALEB has two pots and a glass measuring cup laid out in front of him. He’s drumming on them with a wooden spoon and a whisk.)
OLIVER: You’re supposed to be drying those.
(CALEB pauses and looks at OLIVER, perturbed at him for interrupting his beat. OLIVER places two dripping wet mugs in front of CALEB, who incorporates them into the “drum kit” and resumes playing.)
OLIVER: I’ll tell Mom.
CALEB: Relax, Liver. I’ll dry the dishes.
OLIVER: (Shouting over the noise) And I’ll tell her you’re calling me Liver, too.
CALEB: (Stops drumming) Jesus, Oliver. That’s your problem, you know.
OLIVER: (Sticks his chin out and goes back to washing dishes. Pause.) You shouldn’t say “Jesus” like that.
CALEB: (Incredulous laugh) Who gave you that shiner?
OLIVER: Ronnie Kent.
CALEB: What for?
OLIVER: I dunno. I was just getting a drink of water.
CALEB: (Talking over him) I’ll tell you what for. It’s cause you’re a pussy.
OLIVER: (Turns off sink, puts the metal strainer in front of Caleb and gives his brother full attention) What’s a pussy?
CALEB: It means you’re too good. Teachers love you. Parents love you. The principal knows your name, and not cause he caught you smoking weed by the dumpster. Christ, I bet you can’t even drop an f-bomb. You make everybody else look bad, see?
(OLIVER drops his eyes and goes back to washing dishes – sullenly now, and embarrassed)
CALEB: And what’s worse, you let people walk all over you for it. I mean, Jesus, Liver, you’re a smart kid; do yourself a favor and learn to sucker punch someone, yeah?
(OLIVER is silent, so CALEB goes back to drumming.)
CALEB: (Loudly over his own noise) I’d tell you to play dumb but it’s too late for that. They all know better. You dug your own grave, kid.
OLIVER: Shut up, Caleb. You’re just as bad as they are.
CALEB: I’m just sayin’! Man up or high school’s gonna suck monkey–
(OLIVER turns around suddenly and hits CALEB in the head with the frying pan – not hard enough to knock him over, but hard enough to make a loud clang.)
CALEB: Jesus, Oliver!
OLIVER: Dry the dishes, douchebag.
(CALEB turns away from OLIVER and complies, grinning.)

Help me out - what did you learn about the characters from what they say and do? What do they want/what motivates them? This one hasn't been workshopped and probably never will be, so I need your input! Thanks, my loves ^_^

Oh, and while you're being awesome, check out my new article on boston.com! This one's about a bluesy duo, Dwight & Nicole. Talking to the two of them and their producer was so much fun, and they gave me so many great quotes I could hardly decide which ones to keep. This was definitely one of the most fun articles I've written!

Peace, love, and trippy Anime movies,
Miss Rex


Stephanie Faris said...

Liver! How cute!!! I think it's grat. It pulled me right in and made me laugh out loud.

Oh...and I have an award for you on my blog today!

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