New poetry: Existentialover

Existentialover

They jumped the gun
and lit the furnace in the woods some
eight weeks ago. The wind lifted paper flames
up to the butter-pat moon and it was
beautiful, watching everything die like that.
And there you were, waiting, ensconced
in the willow branches’ orange cave like you knew
someone was coming while the meteors
diffused overhead.

So is this the end of the world, or do we
finally carry on? Hope is an ever-rising
phoenix: and there I was
to witness the Caesarean section
birth of a thing
that was, perhaps, less than ready
to swallow the cold, hard nitrogen
left over when the fire
burnt out. Well, at least the sun is out, but
it’s awful cold for Halloween.

-------

Please comment! Ask questions, make me think about why I made the choices I did. Ask me about line breaks, word choice, whatever. Oh, and for the sake of argument, the last line was originally repetition of the first line; would it be better if I put that back in? I don't want it to seem like it's about Halloween, so maybe I just shouldn't mention the holiday at all.

Not so bad, as far as Tuesdays go.

Today I had to give an oral presentation on Rockstar Energy Drink and its marketing strategies. We gave out samples of Rockstar to everyone in the class, then proceeded to tell them why they shouldn't buy Rockstar because in doing so they're supporting Michael Savage, host of the Savage Nation radio show. Some of his worse moments include:

"Not all Muslims are terrorists, but all terrorists happen to be Muslims."
"I'll tell you what autism is. In 99% of the cases, it's a brat who hasn't been told to cut the act out."
And my personal favorite, directly to a gay man who called in with an airline horror story at Savage's request: "Oh, you're one of the sodomites. You should only get AIDS and die, you pig."

After we'd finished, there were a few shots of Rockstar left (we gave it out in ketchup cups XD), and I figured that since I now knew everything about the product except how it tasted, it was about time I tried some. That little shot was enough to make me choke. And THIS is the most popular seller in Go-Co's bookstore?!

After class, Sam said to me, "I'll never forget the look on your face after you took your first sip of Rockstar...."

Glad to have been such good entertainment.

Oh yeah, and this morning I woke up from a dream in which I drank our glowing Mountain Dew concoction, and when I looked at my stomach, my innards were glowing. And then they were going to fall out, so I was like, "Guys, we gotta go to the hospital. Someone's gotta come with me. I'll drive, but someone's gotta come with me."

----------------------------------------------

Stupid poet rant:

Why can’t people understand that WRITING POEMS does not make you a POET? These days there are a million and one emo kids bleeding all over their notebook pages and calling it poetry. And I suppose it's a sort of verse, yes; but if all you ever do is bleed, kid, you’re not a poet.

A poet ought to paint her words with a feather or trace them on the surface of the sea. The process is fragile, as subject to change as clear skies in Boston – but you carve your words in granite with a chisel, never to be rescinded. Every one of them is there on purpose. You will not hear of changing them: heresy! You don't write for yourself. But you don't care if your words are any good, so you don’t write for anyone else, either.

How can you call yourself a writer when all you do is bleed?

Stupid boy rant (abridged):

I don't go out on a limb for just anybody. I would offer you my heart, but worse than breaking it, you'd just ignore that it was even there.

Mountain Dew: Solution to America's Energy Crisis?

Forget expensive electricity costs! Say goodbye to foreign oil dependency! Mountain Dew is the answer!!

Tonight, Schneckleface, the Spontaneous Concert Enthusiast and I went to Shaws and bought a whole bunch of Mountain Dew because we saw this video of a guy making glow-in-the-dark Dew by adding baking soda and hydrogen peroxide to the soda. I thought a glowing bottle of Mtn Dew seemed like a great thing to carry around on Halloween night, no matter what your costume may be. But unfortunately, it turned out the video was faked, so instead we broke open a glow stick and poured that into it. The level of epicness was seriously disappointing, so we gave up and shneckled instead. And to think that for that hour or so, I was convinced I'd solved the energy crisis with simple baking and first aid supplies....


So nobody sues me or deletes my blog or anything stupid like that, the Strong Bad video is not by me; OBVIOUSLY it came from Homestarrunner.com. This should go without saying, but in the world of lawsuits, nothing does.

1000 Words

For Shmoe, because he's not allowed to use Facebook. =)

NIGHTLIFE


This is how weekend nights go down around here: skulking around and planting plastic green army men in random places.



SPIRIT WEEK:


"Rust Red" Day (which I modified to "wear a little 'rust' and a lot of 'red.'")


"Tartan" Day (and they'll give you points for anything with even a remotely checkery sort of pattern XD)


"Wear Your Go-Co Gear" Day. Do you like my double glasses with the shmexy GC stickers?


Spontaneous Concert Enthusiast shows his school spirit on Gordon Gear Day.

THE WOODS


Go-Co woods in the fall.




A friend. =)

NODROG

Left-Overs

A couple of poems I neglected to post when I wrote them.

1: A Cento, which is a conglomerate of lines from other works - poems, novels, movies, anything you can think of to quote is fair game in a cento. See if you can identify the quotes! =D

“Cento on Writing”

The person lives
in this world, in this uncanny
house with the ones and zeros.
We always have been caged.
Writers live
in their imagination with
the falling sky; we are lost
in the Technicolor on the Everglow.

When you write, let the world slip.
Be the axe for the frozen sea within.
The heartless ghost alone’s unhurt, so burn,
like fabulous yellow does on blue.
Tame the stars, riders (or fools).
Make a wish or just take charge.

I dreamt I found a fair of wonders
under the skysigns,
upon the sighful branches of my mind.
Sunsets and silhouette dreams:
There is nothing as lucky,
as easy, as free.
O duty! Shaken by your beauty,
We’re awakening.

In our dreams we can be complete,
but I have miles to go before I sleep.


2. Ekphrasis - a response to another piece of art, such as a painting or sculpture. This one is in response to Zingarelli's Host and Hunger exhibit.

olivers

There is a posture for
receiving, and they have mastered it – or
it has mastered them, stepped
on their patient fingers, made them slaves.
It has damned them to turn
the millstone, but not
a profit.

Grind
the stone. Grind the
stone. Grind the stone.

Oh, that the sky would rain
manna upon gargoyles, warped by want,
and their twisted, gaping maws!

There is a technique for seeing without
perceiving, and
we are professionals.
Want is an impatient hackney-carriage driver
and he never arrives –

only drives,
only drives, only
drives.

Oh, that the sky would rain re-
straint upon gargoyles, warped by want,
and our twisted, gaping hearts; that some
one would hear
the swelling scream and the waxing
plea for more

It's a Small World After All.

A man by the name of Seel spoke at today's convocation and invited anyone who was interested to come have a discussion over lunch after chapel hour. He mentioned a connection with Walden Media (they did the Narnia movie), and so, since the last Walden representative I spoke with had a lot of helpful things to say (such as the fact that Walden was thinking of starting a publishing faction), I decided to go.

But we didn't talk about Walden at all. We talked about changing individuals by changing culture, rather than the other way around. We talked about how to change culture: by changing the institutions that form it. We discussed why evangelicalism doesn't work anymore. It's because we live in the "third world," and the first two consisted of societies founded on spirituality, but ours doesn't want to be, so we can't communicate with people as though they belonged to the second world. "We are surrounded by nothingness," says society; "we stand alone."

Seel also happened to mention that a book cannot just be written; it has to be institutionalized. What the heck does that mean? I had to approach him afterward to ask.

He explained that when you write a book or make a movie, it needs to reach people or there was no purpose in creating it. It must be distributed, and writers and filmmakers have to consider this when they publish or produce their work. If the producer has no way of getting the movie on more than 2000 screens and the publisher has no means of putting the book on the shelves of Barnes and Nobles everywhere, you've got a problem.

So writing institutionally simply means that you have to consider that you are writing within certain boundaries set by institutions, and you have to play by their rules.

Then he asked me whether I had an agent (I'd mentioned that I'd self-published two YA fic books) and, when I said I didn't, suggested that I contact a man by the name of Rench. He said he does some agenting work himself, but he's mostly a producer and thought Rench would do a better job. What a fantastic opportunity! And to think, I wanted to sleep through convocation this morning!

Then he asked where I went to high school. When I said Coho, he was amazed and pointed to the address on his business card: Coho. That's right, my tiny little 8000-population town that I always though was only home to rich snobs (except for my friends, of course). He goes to the church I used to go to when I was REALLY little and where my friend Ash and his family go now. I asked if he knew them, and he did! What are the odds? It's a small world, after all.

The Academy Is... exclusive podcast screenplay!!

ARE YOU FLIPPING SERIOUS, INTERNET? REALLY? REALLY???

So I spent like FOUR HOURS writing the most AMAZING script TAITV will ever see, because The Academy Is... was having a contest that asked fans to submit an episode for their weekly podcast. Then I got to Friends or Enemies dot com at like the last possible minute, because it took me a long time to perfect the script, and found out that I had to register. Ok fine, I thought. One minute to midnight (the deadline); I can type fast. I filled out the form and clicked "sign up."

Nothing.

The site wouldn't respond. Not on Safari, not on Firefox. Not for Schneckleface, either. Maybe too many people were submitting their scripts at once.

So I went to their website to find a contact e-mail address. But their site was down. So THEN, in a last-ditch, 14-minute late, DESPERATE attempt to get my story in to them, I messaged them on *shudder* MySpace. Who knows if they'll ever even SEE my screenplay now. But what else could I do?? I am a victim here! A victim of sucky websites and I guess maybe just a little bit of procrastination. But for once, it was the CLASSES stopping me from doing something else, rather than something else distracting me from homework. It just figures.

Anyway, even if TAI never gets to read my brilliant, semi-professionally-formatted script, I want the rest of the world (a.k.a. the five people who read my blog) to get to see it. If you don't watch TAITV, you probably won't find this very entertaining. You have my permission to skip the rest of this entry and forget all about the rant you just read.

And now... an entry long enough to make up for the almost-a-whole-week that I didn't post. =)

MIXUP MAYHEM

1. INT. DARK, CRAMPED ROOM

Looks like a laboratory of some sort – lots of little blinking LIGHTS, maybe some BOTTLES of unidentified LIQUIDS smoking quietly (DRY ICE).

VILLAIN
Masked and cloaked, he emerges from the shadows and delivers a speech about The Academy Is… becoming too popular for their own good and his foolproof plan to stop them with a brilliant potion he’s devised. Put some sweet effects on his voice to make him sound even more villainous.


2. INT. NIGHT THE ACADEMY IS…’S TOUR BUS

VILLAIN
Sneaks on and adds his POTION to some DRINKS sitting out on the counter. Maybe some more DRY ICE for effect. He slips away unnoticed.


3. INT. NIGHT THE ACADEMY IS…’S TOUR BUS
WILLIAM, SISKY, CHISLETT, THE BUTCHER, CARDEN.

Enter WILLIAM, SISKY, CHISLETT, CARDEN and THE BUTCHER, talking excitedly about the amazing show they just played.

SISKY
Man, I wish Baby could have seen that show.

WILLIAM
She would’ve gotten stepped on in that crowd.

THE BUTCHER
Good, maybe Sisky’d stop talking about her then.

SISKY
[looks horrified]

CHISLETT
(to CARDEN)
Hey, Mike, you did a great job singing “intoxicated circulation” tonight. I really felt it, you know?

CARDEN
Yeah, I’ve been working on that line a lot.

WILLIAM
I think it’s time we kicked back to celebrate a show well played.

CHISLETT
Good idea, mate; let’s have some Vegemite.

WILLIAM
[picks up DRINKS on the counter]
I’ve got something better.

They sit and talk some more, laughing and enjoying their drinks. Then everybody goes to bed.


4. INT. MORNING THE ACADEMY IS…’S TOUR BUS
WILLIAM, SISKY, CHISLETT, THE BUTCHER, CARDEN.

The guys wake up to discover that they are not themselves – literally. Thanks to the potion…
- WILLIAM’S brain is now in CARDEN’S body
- CARDEN’S brain is in SISKY’S body
- SISKY’S brain is in CHISLETT’S body
- CHISLETT’S brain is in THE BUTCHER’S body
- THE BUTCHER’S brain is in WILLIAM’S body.

WILLIAM
enters, wearing the BUTCHER’S RED SHORTS.

WILLIAM
Morning.

SISKY
[Struggling to keep a straight face]
How come you’re wearing the Butcher’s shorts?

WILLIAM
What are you talking about? These are my shorts, Sisky. I am the Butcher.

SISKY
It’s Mike.

WILLIAM
What?

SISKY
[still trying not to smile]
You called me Sisky. I’m Mike.

WILLIAM
[looks confused]

CHISLETT
[enters, looking distressed]
You guys, I just had this terrible dream that the Butcher butchered Baby and Little Girl!
[notices SISKY and panics]
Who are you? What are you?
[Suddenly notices he’s speaking with an Australian accent]
Why am I talking like Chizzy?!

WILLIAM
Wait wait wait wait.
[points to CHISLETT]
So you’re saying you’re Sisky…
[points to SISKY]
and you’re saying you’re Mike?

CHISLETT and SISKY
nod.

WILLIAM
And you’re saying I’m not the Butcher?

CHISLETT and SISKY
nod again.

WILLIAM
finds a MIRROR and looks at himself.

WILLIAM
What the hell?! I’m Bill!

CHISLETT
How could this happen?

WILLIAM
What I want to know is, who’s in my body?

SISKY
And mine.

THE BUTCHER
[enters]
G’day, fellas.

WILLIAM
[stares at THE BUTCHER’S tattooed arms]
Wow, sweet tats….

THE BUTCHER
[is baffled and looks at his arms.]

CHISLETT
(Quickly, before THE BUTCHER can say anything)
Look, man, somehow our brains all got switched. I’m actually Sisky.
[Points to William]
And he’s the Butcher,
[points to Sisky]
and he’s Mike.

THE BUTCHER
How could something like this happen?

CARDEN
[enters, wearing a v-neck shirt and toweling off his wet hair]
Hey.

SISKY
Oh, hey, Bill! Have you noticed anything, I dunno…
[suppresses a laugh]
…strange about yourself this morning?

CARDEN
[looks suspicious]
Why? What did you do, put purple dye in my shampoo? Dip my toothbrush in the toilet?

WILLIAM
He just wondered if you noticed you were in Mike’s body today.

CARDEN
[notices WILLIAM for the first time and his eyes get really big.]

WILLIAM
We all switched brains! Isn’t that crazy, Bill?

CARDEN
[narrows his eyes and moves closer to inspect WILLIAM’S hair]
Hey, whoever you are, wash my hair. Use the Pantene, and make sure you rinse and repeat.
[exits.]

Fade

5. EXT. DAY NEXT TO CAROLINA LIAR’S TOUR BUS/VAN
CHISLETT and WILLIAM

WILLIAM:
Hey, Carolina Liar is setting up right now. You know what we should do?

CHISLETT:
What?

WILLIAM:
We should go and steal some more shit. No one would ever know it was us!

CHISLETT:
(his face lights up)
The Butcher, I knew there was a good reason we were friends.

WILLIAM and CHISLETT sneak on board and take stuff.

6. INT EVENING AT THE VENUE

CARDEN
[is in the middle of vocal warm-ups.]

WILLIAM:
Hey, Bill, you should come back to the bus and see all the stuff me and Sisky took from Carolina Liar!

CARDEN:
(singing)
Awesome.


7. EXT EVENING AT TAI’S TOUR BUS

CHISLETT
bursts out the door.
They came and took Carden! They thought he was Sisky. I tried to tell them I was the real Sisky, but they thought I was crazy.

CARDEN:
Whoa, whoa. Who’s “they?”

CHISLETT:
Carolina Liar! They said it was revenge for all the shit we stole!
[Holds up some of the loot]

WILLIAM:
We’re gonna need reinforcements.

They go to find THE BUTCHER, who’s talking to JIMMY using their native lingo. THE BUTCHER and JIMMY join them.

They round up whoever else they can find (Tony, Jack, techs, other bands).

8. EXT EVENING CAROLINA LIAR’S VEHICLE

WILLIAM, CHISLETT, CARDEN, THE BUTCHER and their reinforcements surround the VEHICLE.

THE BUTCHER
(using a MEGAPHONE)
We have your vehicle surrounded. Come out with your hands up.

CHAD
opens the door.

THE BUTCHER
(still using the MEGAPHONE) talks tough, makes threats until CHAD interrupts.

CHAD:
Sisky ain’t here. He got kidnapped from the kidnappers.

[Beat]

THE BUTCHER
(tonelessly, still using the MEGAPHONE)
What?

[FLASHBACK: EXT AFTERNOON CAROLINA LIAR’S VEHICLE]

VO CHAD explaining what happened.

VILLAIN wearing a cape and a mask stopped them on their way back from TAI’s bus and said that he needed to talk to Adam. The kidnappers initially thought it was someone from TAI dressed up. Then the VILLAIN grabbed Sisky and they both vanished with a bright FLASH.

[END FLASHBACK]

9. INT EVENING AT THE VENUE

WILLIAM, CHISLETT, CARDEN and THE BUTCHER split up to scour the venue for SISKY and his mysterious kidnapper. Unsuccessful, they converge in front of the one door none of them has checked yet. They enter cautiously.

SISKY is strapped to a DESK CHAIR with DUCT TAPE. The VILLAIN steps out of the shadows.

VILLAIN:
(evil laughter)
Now your silly little band will never make it big! My evil plan succeeded!

CHISLETT:
Who are you?

CARDEN:
Are you the one who switched our brains around?

VILLAIN:
Brilliant, wasn’t it?
(more laughter)

While the VILLAIN is distracted, SISKY is working himself free of the duct tape.

CARDEN:
Look, I don’t know what your problem is, but we have to play a show in ten minutes, and we need Michael to play guitar.

WILLIAM:
What’ve you got against TAI, anyway?

VILLAIN:
(mockingly)
What have I got against TAI?
(Laughs, but it dies quickly.)

SISKY
breaks free and creeps toward a panel, where a big red button is blinking.

VILLAIN:
(Sadly)
You don’t get it, do you? My whole life, all I wanted was to be in a band, but I was a loser. None of the bands wanted me, not even as a bassist.

CHISLETT:
(offended)
Hey!

SISKY
pushes the button, and the brains are restored to their proper bodies.

VILLAIN:
CURSES! Foiled again!

SISKY:
Hey, man, it’s not so bad.

VILLAIN:
(sniveling) It’s just… it’s so unfair that you guys are talented, popular, and good-looking. I could never be any of those things.

WILLIAM:
We’re not as cool as you think.

SISKY:
Yeah. I mean, I used to have a dead ferret on my head.

CHISLETT:
People don’t even realize I’m in the band sometimes.

THE BUTCHER:
I get mistaken for a lumberjack because of my beard.

WILLIAM:
And sometimes people think I’m a girl.

CARDEN:
And I – uhh… I’m really pretty cool, actually.

WILLIAM:
You see? You don’t have to be cool to be in a band. You just have to love what you do. That’s why we do it.

VILLAIN:
(sniffling) Oh… well…. Since you had to be all noble about it…. You’d better get out there and play.

WILLIAM, SISKY, CHISLETT, CARDEN and THE BUTCHER dash through the halls and make it to the stage just in time to play the show.

END.

Relient K. House of Heroes. Fighting Scots.

Yesterday morning I woke up and was like, "You know what? I'm gonna go see Relient K tonight." I had more or less resigned myself to the fact that I'd have to miss them this time, but a girl on student news was looking for a ride, so I got my heart set on going and I couldn't give it up when she found another ride. So I started calling people, and I found two that wanted to come: Eva, who did La Vida with me in June of '07, and Spontaneous Concert Enthusiast, famous among Go-Coers for his hearty laughter and enthusiastic hugs.

Worcester is a long drive from Go-Co. It took us an hour and a half to get there. It was well worth it, and not even a particularly stressful drive considering how bad I thought it would be to drive on the Mass Pike. The only bad thing, really, was having to pay $1.10 to get off the highway. SCE is a fantastic co-pilot, and I am very grateful for that. I'm pretty good at taking wrong turns. Even when someone is directing me.

We parked on a street behind the lot so we wouldn't have to pay for parking. Then we more or less went straight in. We didn't have tickets so it seemed silly to wait in line with all the ticket holders. I've never gotten into the Palladium faster; I shall have to remember this in the future. I stopped at the merch tables to see if there was anything good/anything I could afford and happened to find out that House of Heroes would be hanging out there by the end of This Providence's set. Good to know =). Then we found a whole bunch of Go-Co people, which was such a relief after the wave of babies at Cobra last weekend.

But we were standing behind these three kids - a guy who was probs like 14, 15 if we're generous, and these two girls who were probably around 12 and 13. And the two girls were just hanging all over the guy, schneckling and nuzzling him. It was so strange. And really sad for the younger girl, who was obviously not as loved. And just plain awkward if the old lady standing next to them was the younger girl's mother, which we suspected she was since they looked a lot alike. We tried to be really awkward about it by imitating them behind their backs, but they were too absorbed in their own PDA-fest to notice us. We affectionately dubbed them "the Mormon triplets" and made plans to start a mosh pit as soon as possible to disrupt their shmooze-a-thon.

House of Heroes played first, and they were truly the reason I'd wanted to go. I've seen Relient K like 8 times, and their shows are fantastic, but it wouldn't be the end of the world if I missed one, you know? But House of Heroes just put out a new CD, The End Is Not The End, and it's the most brilliant thing I've heard in years. Needless to say, I went totally nuts the whole time. It was awkward because no one else knew the music well enough to be as into it as I was, and I can't say that HoH has mastered the art of getting a crowd going, so it was just me and SCE dancing our brains out. They played "If," "Lose Control," "Leave You Now," "In the Valley of the Dying Sun," "Code Name Raven," and "Faces" off the new album, plus a couple older ones, but I forget which. At the end of their set, they threw out t-shirts into the crowd and one landed near us. Eli got it and gave it to me since I love them so much. It was old school, from when "Say No More" was new.

Then This Providence played. I don't know much by them, but I have an album Brace Face gave me last year so I recognized a few of their songs. They played my favorite, "My Beautiful Rescue." As their set was ending, Eva and I went back to the merch table to see House of Heroes. Tim was there and I was the first to talk to him. I said the new album was the best thing I'd heard in years, and he asked since what, but I couldn't think of an answer until later.

He asked if we were from nearby and I said we went to Go-Co. He said, "Oh, Go-Co!"
And we were both surprised he'd heard of it, so then he admitted he had no idea what Gordon was and said, "Go... bears?"
"Actually, it's Fighting Scots," I told him. "For some reason we're Scottish."
"You're Scottish?"
"Well uh.... our founder was, anyway."

Then I went all hyper-fangirlish and asked to take a picture with him. He was such a good sport, trying to get us in the right light so we'd show up on Eva's cell phone. We must've tried four times to get a good one, and I was totally okay with that since it meant he put his arm around me four times. XD And then I went all out and got him to sign the shirt SCE had given me earlier. "Sorry that I'm being such a hyper little fan," I said. "It probably gets really old." But Tim said he understood completely. He told me they'd toured with Silverchair recently, and I guess that band was heroes of his, so even though they were working together, he still had to go up to them and say, "....will you sign this...?"

Then we went back to hear Ludo, and I'm glad I didn't cut out on their set to talk more to Tim and the guys because they were actually really awesome. They were the only band playing that I hadn't heard of. But I was sold when they introduced their rock opera, saying that it was about a guy whose wife died in 1989 so he built a time machine to go back and save her but ended up in the Jurassic Period, swarmed by pterodactyls. Then they played one about going on vacation with your two friends, only to have your two friends get eaten by the lake monster. By the time they closed with "Ghostbusters," I was kind of in love. The old lady near us apparently was, too, since she got pretty into that one. She and the Mormon triplets left when Ludo did. Thank goodness. But sad day that we didn't get to smash their schnecklerama. I'm having so much fun inventing words to describe the sketchiness.....

And then I was reminded just how fulfilling a concert can be. There is nothing, nothing, nothing that could have made last night better, except perhaps a single hug from Matty T. But I was 100% content without it; the music just left me with such a high, and the audience was terrific once they got going! We got really close to the front, but that changed as soon as the moshing started. Ohhhh mannn, what a FAN-FRICKEN-FABULOUS pit! How can I even describe it? It opened up for the chorus and died down on the verses; so it was exhausting, but at least we got to breathe in between. I always think it's sort of funny in circle pits, because I'm usually one of maybe three girls involved. It's sort of amazing I'm still alive, actually. I've got some sweeeet bruises from this one.

Relient K came out wearing black and purple, with dark make-up around their eyes so they looked sunken in like Gerard Way's. There was a huge tarantula on the drum set and some skulls and candles on top of the piano and amps. Matty T came out wearing a vampire cape. Psh, forget that dude from Twilight. I'll take Matty T over him ANY day.

They played Mood Rings, which I've never heard them play live. That was what started the moshing; I think all the die-hard fans like me just couldn't contain themselves anymore. We all sang happy birthday to Ethan Luck, the new drummer (I miss Daaaaave D'=). That makes two concerts in a row that I've gotten to sing happy birthday. Then Hoopes and Warne spanked him 30 times with their guitars while T-sun counted hits by hitting the cymbal. He said it was the first time he'd ever played drums on stage in front of an audience. How special =D.

For the encore, they played Deathbed off of "Five Score," and for the first time in my life, I was at a Relient K show and completely unable to sing along. I'll confess that I was never a fan of that song. I listened to it when the album came out and then sort of dismissed it and forgot its existence. It was great, though; really epic. The other bands came out to help and there were trumpets.

When everything was over and most of the crowd had dispersed, I found one of the picks that Matty T had thrown into the audience. I don't believe people can catch picks because they're so tiny. Luckily, this one was bright orange and easy to spot once the people were gone. I knew it was Matt's because it had his signature printed on it (sadly, it's not autographed by hand, but I'll take what I can get.)

On the way out, we saw House of Heroes again. This time I saw the whole band and got them all to sign my shirt, which I was wearing at that point even though it was too small.

I told them "The End" was the best thing I'd heard since Dream Theater's "Octavarium," and they were shocked that anybody would think they were that good. I talked to Tim for a few more minutes while SCE got Ludo's CD signed. As we were leaving, Tim called me back and asked, "What was your mascot again?" "Fighting Scots," I reminded him. So he shouted, "GO FIGHTING SCOTS!" and all the Go-Co people there were like w00t...!...?

After the show, we picked up my friend Moka who goes to school in Worcester and we all went to Wendy's. I was famished, so I got pretty much the only two things on the menu I can still eat: fries and a Frosty. They were delicious. (WHY can't I use that word without thinking of Guy Ripley?!) Then we finally headed home. I don't know about anyone else, but as for me, that's the happiest I've been in a while.

I'm still giddy. =D

How to be Invisible

Wow, I am really excited at the 8 comments left on my last entry. That's a new record! Thanks everybody! =D

Yes, Schneckleface, I intentionally titled that blog "Cold Turkey" because it was about NOT eating turkey. ^_^

So a brief update on life. Monday I got food poisoning from Lane. I'm not giving up fish because I truly think I can't live without seafood; it's my favorite! So when I saw that fish nuggets were on the menu, I was stoked to eat meat for the first time in almost a week. Buuuut that backfired. And the pain was only made worse by the fact that I got my period at the exact same time I got the food poisoning; in fact, at first I blamed my stomachache on cramps and decided that childbirth would be a bad idea for me. I had to miss my one and only Monday class, which I would normally be excited about because it's kind of boring (tutoring one-to-one), but this week some tutors who already work in the writing center were going to be there giving advice to all the noobies and I actually wanted to go.

Later that night I met up with Brad (a guy from my applied comm course) to work on scripting a short fiction film. It was actually really fun. Thank goodness I felt so much better by then. Working in small teams like that gave us a chance to be a little less business-like and a little more silly, which always makes group projects more enjoyable.

Then, because I spent my afternoon writhing in pain on my bed instead of doing homework, I was up til 2:30 finishing work and I only got 5 hours of sleep, which is NOT enough to recover on. Especially when you've got 9 hours of classes the next day. But I survived it. And I got a voicemail from my birth mother saying that she was finally able to contact my birth father (they weren't married when they had me and now they both have their own families) and that he wants to get in touch with me! This is really exciting because we were all bracing ourselves for the fact that he might not want to have anything to do with me. I'm going to call Momma back today.

I went to bed early last night, and I was just falling asleep when girls started running up and down our hall, yelling and thumping so loudly that I stormed out of my room wearing PJ pants and a bra and yelled at them to keep it down. I can be nasty when I lose sleep. Remember that. But after yelling at them, I tossed and turned for ages. And when I finally got to sleep, I had another of my trademark fuzzy dreams.

I was on a huge vessel at sea. I don’t even want to call it a ship because it was so big. There were loads and loads of people on it, most of them around my age, and we were all studying the arts. (On a side note, this would be an amazing semester abroad… haha.) I’m sure we were studying other things, too, but in the dream that was the only thing we did. In fact, I’m pretty sure the arts were not the priority of whoever was in charge of studies, because we got shunted into this tiny little room with hardly any light and not nearly enough seats for everybody.

So when we dropped anchor, my class was eager to get off the ship and go exploring. Our instructor knew where we were and took us to see a real live invisible spot. She said it’s not possible for a person to become invisible, but that the earth’s magnetics sometimes interact in such a way as to create one of these natural invisible spots, and she showed us how if we stood on this little ridge of earth and reached up, we’d find the spot – and sure enough, her hand disappeared when she did it! So then I tried. I thought it would feel really strange to be invisible, but in fact I felt exactly the same as before; I just couldn’t see my fingers.

I found it hard to believe the area had not been fenced off and admission charged for entry. Whoever found it must have thought it would be a bad tourist attraction. Maybe it was dangerous somehow. Maybe it revealed too many secrets of the world that ordinary people shouldn’t know.

While the other students tried out the invisible spot, I noticed an enormous grey bird flying overhead and whipped out my camera. When I say enormous, I really mean that this thing was the size of like… a hippogriff. Except it wasn’t one; it was just a really large bird with terrifying talons and a vain personality, which was obvious since it came closer and closer the more pictures I took. But everyone else was too busy being invisible to notice the bird, and eventually it left, and we left.
I guess that we decided to stay anchored where we were for a while, because shortly after, some of us were living in a two-story house right next to a police office. Apparently I suddenly had a little brother named Nick, and it was our house, but I don't know where our parents were. Haha, maybe this was the sequel to the last dream I had about being on a ship, in which my mother yelled at me for embarrassing my little sister in front of the Jonas Brothers.

Then we found out that the huge grey bird was coming, and that was enough to throw everyone in town into an absolute panic. It was as if we’d heard there was a tornado coming. We stocked up on food and other necessities and prepared to batten down the hatches. Except instead of the basement, we withdrew to the upstairs, which seems like a stupid idea since birds can fly and stuff. But in the dream it was a good idea and we would be safe there if we locked all the doors and blacked out the windows. Maybe the bird was like, an air raid or something. I don’t know.

Nick and I were trying to fit all our friends into the upstairs of our house, which was getting really crowded. Time was running out before the bird would come, and a couple of our closest comrades hadn’t come yet, so we kept waiting to lock up. They finally got there, and we locked up just in time.

Cold Turkey

Get this. Some other girl got MORE than 289 spirit points! Which means no Red Sox tickets for me. And I guess I'm also bummed about the title of homecoming queen, which I would've had if I'd gotten the most points. Because I'm not popular enough to ever get voted as such, so really the only way I'd ever get it would be by getting the most spirit points. Blahh. Maybe next year. =/

I figured out why I've been exhausted - and I mean besides getting destroyed at Cobra Starship on Friday, because the level of exhaustion I've felt since then has been more than I've ever felt after ANY show, even the Warped Tour, and that goes ALL DAY. And I moshed a lot more there than I did on Friday. No, the reason I've been tired is NO IRON. Here's why.

Last week, my media writing class watched this awful documentary on animal cruelty and I think I'm going to try and go vegetarian, or else search for a local farm where I can buy meat products, eggs and dairy. I don't really know what to do about the dairy because I need to get protein from somewhere, and most of my favorite foods are dairy; vegetables are total lamesauce without cheese or dressing on them, and I am not drinking soy. But you know what they do to dairy cows? They give them all these hormones to make their udders huge so they'll produce way more milk than any cow naturally would. And they keep them pregnant all the time so they can take the calves and shove them in tiny cages until they're big enough to slaughter for meat.

All the animals - cows, chickens, hens, pigs - are kept in tiny cages without enough room to move forward and backward or side to side. They can't even sit down, or at least the chickens can't. And they abuse them! They just throw chickens around like used rags. They don’t want male chicks because they won't produce eggs, so millions of them are thrown into dumpsters every year and left there to SUFFOCATE. They give chickens so many hormones that their breasts get too heavy for them to stand, and their legs break. They drag protesting cows to the slaughterhouse BY THEIR EARS!

How can anyone eat something knowing that's what had to be done to put it on their plate??? Even if it tastes flipping amazing! So I'm quitting meat-eating, cold turkey. Does anybody know a local farm where I can buy stuff? I know the grocery store carries cage-free eggs; I checked yesterday. And I'm going to take this one step at a time and not worry about the dairy just yet. But meat. Does anybody know a local farm where I can buy meat? And does anybody want to teach me how to cook it?? XD

edit: for the record, I AM taking vitamins with 100% dv of iron in them. =)

Fangs Up!

Summary of my Friday: a boy took off my clothes, and then I went out and got totally destroyed. XD

Let me explain.

Yesterday was Go-Co gear day for Spirit Week. I went around my floor borrowing stuff from everyone who was around. Then I waddled over to Lane to meet up with Spontaneous Concert Enthusiast, who brought me more Go-Co stuff. In the end I wore 4 pairs of sweatpants, 11 shirts, and 3 hoodies tied around my waist. Also, I stuck Go-Co stickers on everything in my backpack. And I brought a handful of Go-Co pencils that I bought at the bookstore that morning for 15 cents apiece. It came out to 66 points.

Then I realized I couldn't move enough to get the shirts off and SCE had to take off the first 5 layers for me so I'd have enough mobility to get the rest. I delegated him to get the Red Sox tickets for me if I won and they presented them later that night, since I would be - that's right - IN NEW HAMPSHIRE SEEING COBRA FLIPPING STARSHIP.

The Pantsless One got stuck in traffic and we got a late start because of that, so Schneckleface made PB&J sammiches to take on the road with us. We didn't get lost even once until we came to the end of the Google Maps directions and still weren't at the place. Apparently they just wanted us to guess the last few miles of the journey. Not only was it farther than the directions said, but where the building should have been according to the street numbers, there were only houses. We started worrying that it would be someplace really random and sketch.... like a rundown old barn that someone decided to call a "ballroom" just for kicks. But we finally found the place AND got free parking really close by.

The openers were Sing it Loud, Hit the Lights, and Forever the Sickest Kids. And they were pretty good, I guess. No one whose CDs I'd spend money on, but fun to listen to. I have more to say about the crowd than the music.

The audience was ENTIRELY middle and high school kids. I felt so totally lame. I wish Cobra would play an 18+ show, but I'm not sure they could sell it out. High school kids are vicious! It was a battle just getting enough space for my lungs to expand and contract. It was so sweaty in there that all I wanted to do was run out of the venue, across the street and into the ocean. There was some jumping around, and that was fun. There were a couple of circle pits, too. I ended up on the floor twice, though.

It’s just, all those little kids HAD to be brought there by parents. If MY mom had brought me to that show when I was their age, she would've dragged me out of that pit the first time someone dropped an f-bomb. So like I probably wouldn't have even gotten to hear the first song or anything.

And there were these twelve year old groupies telling everyone they were 15 and they were staying there until 3AM, and these other twelve year old groupies who wrote their phone numbers all over one of their AA-cup bras and hung it on the handle of the tour bus after the show. Good grief. Do you kids even HAVE parents? But it was great because this random guy picked up the bra and called the girl pretending to be Gabe Saporta.

I must take a moment to gripe about crowd surfers again. When your arms are pinned to your side, there is absolutely nothing you can do to save your neck. At one point I came up from having someone on my head and I was kind of dizzy, and I didn't think much of it until afterwards, when I started to worry I had a concussion. Of course, by the time this occurred to me we were all the way back at the Denny's near my school. The problem is that all the symptoms of a concussion are also side effects of going to a rock show - headache, sore limbs, fatigue. But Schneckleface checked and my pupils were normal.

Cobra Starship finally came out. I’d been shouldering my way forward for a while, as naturally and inobtrusively as possible so people would think I just sort of got shoved in front of them by the crowd. Somebody brought Gabe Saporta a balloon for his birthday. Then we all sang to him. He was so cute, hugging his balloon and smiling while we sang. I had an amazing view of everything that happened because I was only six rows back. It was beautiful.

I was surprised that they played a lot of older songs that I didn’t know. I have to say, it’s weird experiencing “Snakes on a Plane” without William Beckett. It’s just not right. But it’s the guys’ personalities that made the show a show. They’re just a bunch of kids who really delight in being awkward, sort of like my friends – I think that’s why they’re so endearing. At one point, Gabe said he was going to give Ryland an ass-shaking lesson and told the crowd that the louder we cheered, the harder he’d shake it. It was hilarious. And really, really loud. Gabe did his share of pelvic thrusting, too.

But possibly the funniest moment of all was Ryland using the word “zygote” on stage to explain that in fact, the band Cobra Starship did not teach him to shake his ass – he learned that as a zygote, or an embryo. Oh, and Gabe announcing that Alex hit him in the penis with his bass, and Alex going “what? Didn’t catch that,” two times in a row so Gabe had to keep repeating himself. Ryland was like, “penis isn’t one of those words you don’t hear the first time. You really don’t need to repeat it THREE TIMES.”

When the show ended, we all screamed for an encore. For a second, Gabe came out like he was going to give one, but he disappeared pretty quickly – almost too fast for us to realize he didn’t have a shirt on. Yummy. =) Then Ryland came out and played “Pleasure Ryland” by himself. I sort of had a feeling they’d try and pull that one off live, just because it’s so random.

The other guys joined him after that for “Guilty Pleasure,” which I couldn’t BELIEVE they hadn’t played since it’s one of their most famous. Then Gabe pulled out this purple hoodie, wiped his face on it, gave it to Ryland to wipe HIS face on, and then threw it out to the crowd. Right to ME! I was the tallest. I touched it first. But I didn’t pull it in fast enough to stop other people from grabbing it, and there were like 8 of us on the floor all fighting for it. I refused to let go. It was rightfully mine!! But then security came and pulled us all off each other and took the hoodie away so nobody got to keep it. >:-(

I guess I got my fair share of love because when Gabe came out to the crowd, I touched his hand! Twice! Haha, I’m such a teenie. I wished he’d been a little more to the right so I could’ve held on to it. I could barely reach. I was surprised at how cold it was, since he’d been rocking out for a while by then.

But some girls after the show told us he was sick, so that would explain it. The three of us waited in the bus enclosure for like an hour, and Cobra never showed (possibly because they were sick). I don't know if they made it to the bus before we did, or if they hadn’t come outside yet, but either way, I was really mad that we’d waited in the cold for so long to no avail, especially since we didn’t have the right passes to even BE where we were. I guess the lesson learned is, it doesn’t matter which side of the fence you’re on if the band never comes out.

While we waited, shivering and clinging to each other for warmth, I made up a story about why the band hadn’t come out yet. It won’t be as funny now because you can’t see me acting it out.

So Cobra Starship was on their way out to the bus when all of a sudden the room went completely dark and filled up with Goombas! And they were jumping all over the heads of the Goombas to squish them, but then Bowser came and unleashed a whole bunch of chain chomps. Things were looking grim for Cobra Starship. But then Amandasaurus, TPO and Schneckleface decided to go looking for the band, and when they realized what was happening, they whipped out their quadruple light sabers and killed Bowser. Then the band was like “wow! You guys are awesome! We totally love you! Let’s like, hang out and spoon and stuff.” (Which we mostly invented because we were all so cold that all we wanted to do was spoon.)

Then we discussed the practicality of a quadruple light saber. How exactly would one wield such a thing? We decided that in fact, one’s body would BE the quadruple light saber. Then you couldn’t cut off your own limbs. You couldn’t lose it or drop it. And it would have been SO useful in that crazy pit. XD

Sorry that was so long. I have to go figure out if I’m getting Sox tickets; I’m really worried they’ll try and reach me by e-mail and it’ll go to the wrong Amandasaurus, and either she won’t forward it in time or she won’t forward it at all because she wants the tickets. I DID have to write my ID number on the sheet when they tallied my spirit points, so it should be fine. But I just really don’t want to get gypped again like I did with that hoodie. Meh.

Spirited Away

Happy Plaid Day!
(checkers and paisley also qualify for spirit points!)

The first thing that happened today was Roomie hearing the bagpipes playing outside and me booking it to the mini-quad in my pajamas to get spirit points. There I found Spontaneous Concert Enthusiast, a.k.a. serial hugger, and Ben, my former Harry-Potter-loving partner in crime. Ben lent me all his plaid clothes and SCE and I made plans to swap plaid clothing at dinnertime so we could both get maximum spirit points.

Then Roomie painted my nails plaid and I colored checkers on my toenails. After that, the day pretty much proceeded normally except for my poetry class going to an orchard and not actually reading much poetry because we were too busy being [college] kids in an [organic] candy store. Mmm, cider donuts. =P And I bought hot pepper jelly to put on crackers with whipped cream cheese! I know that sounds bonkers, but it's delightful, I promise.

After the orchard, I got shirts from Dan and John and layered myself in plaid stuff. I also made sure to bring the sword I improvised out of a cardboard box I found in the recycling room last night (they said you get points for dressing up like Braveheart characters. I guess I should mention that we're pretty Scottish around here, hence the plaid, bagpipes, and Braveheart references.)

I couldn't fit any more shirts on my body, so I started tying them around my waist and neck. I had four pairs of pants, I think. I wore one of them on my head. SCE draped a few more shirts over me at the last second, and then the judges started counting. The sword was worth 75 points. I think I got like 130 total. HELLO, SOX TICKETS!

Except I just realized that most of my Go-Co attire is at home. BUMMER! Who wants to lend me their clothing tomorrow???

The Second Peppers Play

I just completed my most awful poetry assignment to date. Stevick gave us a play from like the 12th century, i.e. it's in olde englysh, and we had to translate it into some modern form of speech - such as gangsta-speak, trucker-speak, you get the picture. But that's not all. We had to maintain the same rhyme scheme and the same pattern of accented syllables from the original as well as the same meaning.

Needless to say, I bitterly resented the assignment and was dreading the number of miserable hours I would have to put into writing it. So to make my life suck just a little less, I decided that "The Second Shepherds Play" would become "The Second Peppers Play," and things just got sillier from there.

I think the most frustrating part was actually the fact that Stevick omitted lines, so the pattern of lines and syllables was not regular, nor did the dialogue really make sense. Non Sequitur Award, right here.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


THE SECOND PEPPERS PLAY
Amanda C. Thompson


Cast (in order of appearance):

3rd Pepper: Cap’n Smack
A red pepper who believes himself to be a pirate.
Voice actor: Johnny Depp (Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Caribbean).

1st Pepper: Dusty Dogwood
A flamboyant yellow pepper who is generally over-enthusiastic.
Voice actor: Carson Kressley (Host of “How to Look Good Naked”).

2nd Pepper: Billy
A green redneck pepper who drives an old pick-up and shaves with a one-blade razor.
Voice actor: Larry the Cable Guy (Mater, Cars).

Trevor
An emo trowel of ill repute: he is known for stealing seeds from Farmer’s fruits.
Voice actor: Alan Rickman (Marvin, Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy).


Script:

CAP’N SMACK: A chantey! Aye.
DUSTY DOGWOOD: Oh! Let me sing the part of tenor!
BILLY: Anyhow, the yodelin’s better.
CAP’N SMACK: Arr, then I’ll sing the mid-line. Weigh anchor!
And-a yo ho ho, me boys!
[They sing a bawdy drinking chorus. Enter TREVOR, who tries to sing along.]
DUSTY DOGWOOD: Oh God, who’s that? His voice sucks.
TREVOR: (aside) These vegetables don’t know my bad luck.
(out loud) I’m the trowel from the shed. I just sit there and rust.
I’m the least of Farmer’s toys.
BILLY: Trevor! Where’d ya go? What’s the word?
CAP’N SMACK: That booty-snatchin’ hoe? You’d best be on yer guard!
TREVOR: I’ll have you know the farmer sent me to the yard –
the guy who sowed your seeds in the garden
last winter.
Fuck you plants! You’re so gumptious,
so high-mindedly captious!
You vitamin-laden, bumptious
boneheads – respect me!
CAP’N SMACK: He’s no bilge-talker. He deserves to be fed to the fish.
TREVOR: Enough, you gawks! Or you’ll be a side dish!
DUSTY DOGWOOD: [Gasps] You wouldn’t dare!
Now drop that silly air
and laissez-faire.
TREVOR: Oh, hey! I didn’t realize – I mean, I thought I knew you!
You’re cool guys.
BILLY: Go cow-tippin’, dude.
F’yer late-night trekkin,
what’ll people reckon?
That you wanna be peckin’
their seeds – like you always do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

for the record, can I NOT read this out loud in class...?

Oh and by the way... I have at least one guy willing to lend me a plaid shirt. w00t. I hope it smells as good as my pajamas did that one time.... O_o

Baby's a Red

Happy Spirit Half-a-Week! (Bummer that we only get three days to look like total fools, eh?) I went to Lane completely dressed in layers and layers of red. I was red down to the underwear (but they had to take my word on that.) And I brought red props, too. The first time I went, I only got 26 points, so I had to go back - people were out-spiriting me by more than 20 or 30 points! Not allowed! Haha. I ended up with 83 points in the end.

Tomorrow will be harder; it's plaid day. I think I have like 3 viable options. Too bad I'm not Matt Thiessen.... I might start calling all the boys I know and ask to borrow their plaid shirts. It's been too long since the last time I cross-dressed. XD

Art/Music/Justice

Re-cap of the Art/Music/Justice concert last night:
(Sandra McCracken, Derek Webb, Brandon Heath, Charlie Peacock, Sara Groves)

I was skeptical about this show from the beginning. As you know, I only bought tickets because CEC guilted me into it. In one respect, it was better than I'd hoped because a concert atmosphere is a concert atmosphere, and live music is live music (i.e. it's always better than listening to a recording).

But in other respects, it was no more than what I'd expected. It had that really family-focused feel to it. Maybe I've just gotten too used to the Vans Warped Tour and TAITV. Actually, I couldn't help chuckling a few times throughout the night that this show and the last/next one on my calendar were such POLAR opposites. Then I felt bad because they talked about sex trafficking, which is an issue that I really want to do something about, and on Friday I'm going to rock out while Cobra Starship sings, "prostitution is revolution/you can hate me until you pay me."

I guess one of the strangest parts for me was, I can't remember the last concert I went to where the primary goal was not simply to have a good time. There was just a weird dichotomy between the fact that it was a concert, but about a third of it was dedicated to the discussion of sobering issues, as well as a mini-sermon from Charlie Peacock. I'm not saying this is a bad thing. I sort of expected it, based on the name of the tour. But it also seemed silly to spend so much time talking about coming to faith and battling injustice when most of the people attending the art/music/JUSTICE tour in the chapel of my Christian college were probably already Chrstians who cared about justice. It had the right emotional impact, but it's like, tell us what WE can do about these issues we're already aware of.

As far as the music went, well, most of the show wasn't my style, although there was something really endearing about Brandon Heath - maybe his nerdiness, maybe the band backing him, maybe the absence of the folk/country feel that characterized Sandra and Derek. But the concert was more or less three hours of artists singing songs that consisted mostly of religious vocabulary, which I hate in music. The name of Jesus has more impact when you don't use it every other word. I really appreciated when Charlie Peacock sang a song called "Kite in a Tree," a song whose imagery is so unexpected and really just marvelous in every way. It's still about faith, as are many of the songs and albums I love, but it addresses it in an unpredictable and stunningly beautiful way. That one song made the $8 I spent on the ticket and the three hours I invested last night worthwhile.

Also, this sort of goes without saying since it was in the chapel, but we sat in pews almost the entire time. I cannot passively sit and observe music, even music that's not my style. I've found that I will actually enjoy a show MORE if I get up and clap. Brandon Heath had us stand and clap for one song after the intermission, and it was the most enjoyable moment of the whole show. All I can say is I can't wait for Friday! No way will that be a passive audience.

On a completely unrelated topic, I'm so bummed! The purple washed out of my hair when I took a shower last night!! Isn't it supposed to be MORE permanent when you do it on bleached hair? Yet somehow, seemingly against all reason and logic of nature, the bleach also appears to have washed out. At least I don't have a random, ugly streak of yellow-blonde at the front of my head.

Ert+Y76p; 0lu8- what is this???

One of several incoherent poetry-reading assignments of the night:

r-p-o-p-h-e-s-s-a-g-r
e. e. cummings

r-p-o-p-h-e-s-s-a-g-r
who
a)s w(e loo)k
upnowgath
PPEGORHRASS
eringint(o-
aThe):l
eA
!p:
S a
(r
rIvInG .gRrEaPsPhOs)
to
rea(be)rran(com)gi(e)ngly
,grasshopper;


The flip is this garbage? I get that there's a grasshopper and he's jumping around and stuff. But all I can think is....

"Ert + y76P; 0lu8-what is this?? Did the quadratic formula explode??? I see a Strong Ba- in there, but it's getting eaten. By some... Linux or something."

In fact, I think I shall quote that SBemail in class on Tuesday to see if anyone gets it. How awkward it shall be if no one does.

NEW TAITV EPISODE ON THEACADEMYIS.COM. Caution: it's reeeeeaally fuzzy this week. Also, I'm like 97% sure they were spoofing Wayne's World with the air guitars, wacky lingo, and random exclamations of "EXCELLENT!" and "BOGUS!"

Jesus has a new face (again).

After I got my laptop fixed from the time I shut the power cord inside it, the webcam wasn't working. I brought it into the Apple store and the guy at the genius bar entered a code, which seemed to fix it. But then I got back to school and it wasn't working again. Three weeks later, I finally got around to making another appointment (which was a story all it's own... more on that in a minute.) Turns out the brand new display they installed was a dud, so the lappy has another new screen. Fortunately, this one was free of charge.

If I never properly explained why the lappy is named Jesus... it's because he got resurrected after 3 days in the Apple store ER that time I broke his face.

Sooo the story of making my appointment. I was out looking for Halloween costumes with Roomie and Schneckleface last night, and we stopped by the Apple store. I decided I'd just make an appointment to get the dumb webcam fixed so I could cross it off my to-do list. So when I made this appointment, I asked to borrow a pen to write the time on my hand. The guy who was helping me offered me a card to write it on, but I was like "nope. I'll lose that. Hopefully I won't lose my hand. If I don't come back tomorrow, it'll be because I don't have a hand anymore." And for some reason he found this utterly hilarious and begged me to come back. Then as we're leaving Roomie was all, "way to flirt with the Apple store guy...." Which made the whole thing ten times funnier.

The trip to the mall was otherwise a complete failure. Roomie did not find the jeans she wanted. None of us found costumes. I guess a Princess Mononoke outfit is kind of hard to find, even when you limit yourself to simply finding a shapeless purple dress on a clearance rack somewhere. By the time we left, poor Schneckleface was asleep on her feet. But when we went to Target to get drugs for Schneckleface's cold, I found this knit dress that was uber cute, besides being the perfect color and blah-shape for a Miyazaki heroine. It was a bit of a splurge - $30 - but it's serving many a purpose, one of those being to show off my sexytastic legs. XD

Then Schneckleface and I did our hair purple. I tried to bleach part of it first, since I was doing streaks instead of tips this time, but the blonde dye failed. I finally got the strand a shade lighter than it had been and put in the purple. It looks more blue than anything, and unless you look closely, it could totally be mistaken for dark brown. Which I guess is a good thing if I'm going to see my mother in the next month. Even though she's probs reading this. Hi, mom.

Oh, and I got to totally embarrass myself in the bathroom because Philmont, this amazing band from NC, asked fans to help them make a music video by singing along to one of their songs. But first, they asked that the fans prepare in some way - do their makeup, hair, stretch, drink an energy drink - so I filmed myself dyeing my hair, then I donned my headphones and proceeded to rock out all over the bathroom. I lip-synced the whole thing because by then it was past midnight and I didn't want to bother anybody, but this one girl came in while I was going nuts and I confused the heck out of her because she was already half asleep. And of course I couldn't stop to explain. I look pretty flippin special for about 90% of the video, which is unfortunate, but I'm gonna send it anyway and just pray that they use the 10% where I don't look like an r-tard.

Well, I should try and finish some homework before the Art/Music/Justice show tonight, which I'm only going to so that CEC will have money to book Philmont. Maybe I can just do homework DURING the show. It's not like anyone's gonna be dancing. I mean, there are pews. Not to mention people here are pretty conservative for students at a liberal arts college. Merh.

FIVE DAYS UNTIL COBRA STARSHIP!!!

Boston

Some people from my poetry class went into Boston tonight to see Seamus Heaney's reading. The guys who introduced him were not that exciting, probs just because they rambled. One of them read a translation he did of a poem about Abraham and Isaac, but it went on for EVER and didn't even sound like poetry - it sounded like he was just reading straight out of the Bible. Heaney was pretty good, though - and funny when he was in between poems. I'll admit I was kind of sleepy and didn't retain a lot, but I remember one phrase, vividly: "fire spores." I think it was in relation to a volcano, but I can't think of any other context; just that the pairing of words was so unexpected and absolutely PERFECT in every way.

Driving in Boston sucks. The confusion, the construction, the homicidal drivers.... It's really stressful. Then again, I get stressed whenever I drive somewhere unfamiliar, and the scenario could have been worse. I'm not in any hurry to repeat it though, especially since I filled my gas tank this morning and it's already got 70 miles on it. On the way home, I added another person to my carload, and searching through my iPod, he found Five Iron Frenzy and was totally happy and we listened to it. He made me turn it up really loud (which is how I like to listen to music anyway, but out of respect for other passengers I usually don't unless I'm alone) and we sang along. It was grand. And THEN we listened to the Pokemon theme song even louder, and sang along even louder, and it was a deeply satisfying bonding experience.

When we got back on campus, I had to park in Woodland, which is always unfortunate. It's even more unfortunate when you get back to your room, decide to try and be productive by fixing that essay, and come to the horrifying realization that "that essay" is in a manila folder on the top of your car..... In Woodland.
 
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