Discoveries

Remember growing up and learning about the three states of matter? Solid. Liquid. Gas. Maybe someone mentioned plasma, but as I recall it was still being researched and not official.

Apparently there are now five official states of matter. Plasma happens when atoms move even faster than they do in a gas. Sometime in the 90s, scientists realized that Bose-Einsten Condensates happen when atoms move even slower than they do in a solid, so slowly that the atoms start to clump together to form these mega-atoms. This shouldn't be possible. But I guess it's as possible as Pluto not being a planet; that is to say, so possible it's true.

It just goes to show that there's always more to learn. There's so much about the universe we don't know yet. There are probably some things we can never know, and some of the things we think we know are probably wrong.

It's a humbling reminder of how tiny we are and, by contrast, how huge everything else out there is. Huge enough for God to be possible. I'm mostly past the point of wondering whether there's a God - I believe there is one even though I don't know exactly what to think about him - but I still find this reminder encouraging. A discovery like this says the universe is so vast and complex that not only is God possible; he's necessary.

I've been feeling this on a personal level, too. I love a lot of people and have fun with a lot of people, yet sometimes I sense this disconnect, like there's nowhere at all that I totally fit in, even with my closest friends. I've always felt I have this big bubble of love inside of me that I want to give to someone, and I've tended to think that someone would be a romantic partner or a best friend, but maybe all along it was God.

There's a depth to my well of love that people can't (or don't) tap. Giving this volume of love away is dangerous, even more so when it's not (or doesn't feel) reciprocated. According to the religion I was raised with, God is the only one who can reciprocate on the level I need.

Sure, I have no idea who God is anymore... and I struggle to imagine what "friendship" with an invisible, intangible other might look like... but where's the harm in talking to him? To those of you who are... "spiritually connected," what do you do to feel close to God, or whatever other spirit you think is out there?

Peace, love, and question marks,
Miss Rex