Ikea, do you kea?

I know, I know... bad pun, especially since Mama Swede says it's not even pronounced "eye-kea." Gotta trust the Swedish lady on this one. BUT BACK ON TOPIC. Have you ever been there? Pants down, most terrifying shopping experience of my life! The building was big enough to host the Vans Warped Tour, comprising a massive showroom and an even more massive warehouse, where you have to go track down the item you found on the showroom floor by aisle (#1-1000) and bin number. Then you gotta lug the furniture all the way to the checkout, where you get to sit in the shopper's equivalent of rush hour WHILE STARING AT THE SCRUMPTIOUS FOOD BEING SOLD FOR SICKENINGLY LOW PRICES JUST BEYOND THE CASH REGISTERS.

All of this for a CD storage rack. Would you believe nobody sells them anymore? We tried Wal*Mart, Target, Sears, F.Y.E., Home Goods, and some local furniture consignment shops, all to no avail. The problem is all this newfangled mp3 nonsense. If people would just buy compact discs the way they did in the 1990s, stores would carry space-effective storage racks for them, but NOOO. CDs are SO 2000-and-late. We've got to be PIRATES, yo!

The Swedish Mama pronounces it "Ick-ea," and I must say... I like that name better.