Sixth Grade Poetry Assignment

While babysitting tonight, it fell to me to help a sixth grader write a poem. I was excited until I saw the outline he was supposed to use. Good grief! Who can be expected to write even halfway decent poetry under such restrictions? Every line said, "I (verb) _fill in the blank_." And the fill-in-the-blank instructions were really, really specific. After I yelled at the assignment, I realized I had probably encouraged the kid not to take it seriously, so I offered to write one of my own. I was amazed: it didn't completely suck. So here it is.

I Am Bored.

I am bored and thinking inside the box right now.
I wonder what’s for dessert….
I hear Cobra Starship playing inside my head and
I want to have a dance party.
I am bored and thinking inside the box right now.

I pretend that I can fly. Sometimes,
I feel the clouds between my toes and
I touch the moon with my face.
I worry that I won’t be able to come back down, and then
I cry for all the people I left behind down there; but
I am bored and thinking inside the box right now.

I understand the parameters. I just don’t like them.
I say a poet should be free to touch the moon with her face!
I dream of creation beyond the walls of this box.
I try to break free, try to put an end to this over-end-stopping.
I hope the frozen yogurt is vanilla tonight.
I am bored and thinking inside the box right now.


I'm seriously debating whether I should change my novel from first to third person. A lot depends on the main character's emotions, but a good writer should be able to communicate those emotions from either perspective, right? I just don't know. I always imagined it in first person, but maybe that's because I perceived the dreams that inspired it from the point of view of the dreamer, which can't be helped. I guess it comes down to, how much will I lose by putting it in third person? And, do I want to give up the uniqueness of writing a fantasy story in first person? I'm at a loss! D=


Brijenieve said...

Have you talked the first/third person question over with your characters? I think a first person fantasy sounds really interesting and fun, but if the story demands a third person pov, you don't have much choice. =) Try writing some of it in 3rd and see what happens, how it feels and go from there.

This is Carrie, by the way - from Glenney's class. I swear I'm not a stalker - but I found your blogger and, since you asked for comments, well, here I am. I've got one as well, mostly for writing and philosophy/theology type things.

Anyway.... hope you're having a good week. =) -Out

Anonymous said...

i want to touch the moon with my face, dangit!


Katie said...

I loved writing "I am" poems.

and I love the fro yo line, second from the end!!!

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